Wear Your Sin Like A Prize
by SoulSoother59
Summary: Marina is a neonatologist and obstetrician at The National Maternity Hospital in Dublin. With her failing romantic life the constant butt of her friends' jokes, Marina wants to change things. But when her childhood bully reappears on the scene, he not only drags up old, unwanted memories but also new feelings altogether. Can Marina let her guard down long enough to let him in?


_**Authors Note: I wrote and published this for a one-shot some time ago. Having gone back to read it again and again and thinking about writing a sequel, I have now decided to write this into a full blown story. It's been on my mind for some time but my personal life is pretty hectic. For anyone reading who has previously read the one-shot, nothing much has changed so far and I hope that you enjoy this version of events. Pronunciations**__** are at the bottom of the chapter. Thanks!**_

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><p>Marina's eyes stung as she opened and closed them several times, trying to ward off the aching exhaustion she was feeling. The scent of fresh brewed coffee invaded her nostrils and she took a deep inhale, her senses swimming with the delicious scent. The balls of her feet were burning despite the sensible work shoes that they were currently stuffed in to. Having been on her feet for over 24 hours would appear maddening to any other person but Marina was dedicated to her work. Opening her eyes, she reached for the Styrofoam cup of coffee on the table in front of her, bringing it to her lips to take a gulp of the surprisingly lukewarm liquid. Marina was more than certain that the coffee had been piping hot when she got it, resounding herself to the fact that she must have dozed off in the cheap plastic hospital canteen chair for a few moments. Just as she felt her eyes beginning to drift shut once more, her beeper went off, jolting her from her sweet slumber.<p>

Standing to her feet, Marina glanced at the beeper, all colour draining from her face as she dashed from the canteen, making a beeline for the elevator and jabbing at the button on the wall. The elevator arrived with a sharp 'ding' and Marina stepped inside, her white doctor's jacket swinging behind her. She rode up to the 5th floor, stepping out into the bustling neonatal unit. An alarm was sounding from one of the patient's rooms and Marina headed straight towards it, managing to force a smile onto her lips when the head nurse, Mhairi, fell into step with her. She handed a chart off to Marina, who quickly flicked through the notes to get herself up to speed.

The patient's name was Diana Kearney. She was currently 29 weeks along in her pregnancy and had been admitted to the hospital suffering signs of early labour. Having already suffered 3 miscarriages over the previous two years, she was a high risk case whom the hospital had been keeping a close eye on. Her previous pregnancies had not progressed beyond the 15 week mark, so she was very lucky to have made it to 29 weeks. However, the preventative measures that the hospital had introduced seemingly weren't holding off the labour.

Marina and Mhairi entered the patients room and Mhairi quickly set about silencing the alarms in the room. Diana was writhing in pain on the bed, beads of sweat on her brow and a panicked look on her face. Marina stepped towards her, taking readings from the machines as she did so.

"Diana, sweetheart, you need to stay calm," Marina tried to reassure her. "I know that's not easy but we don't want to put more stress on the baby."

Diana managed to nod, squeezing her husband Patrick's hand. "I'm scared. And the contractions are really close together now," she told Marina. "What's happening? Is she okay?"

"Her heart rate is elevated but it's nothing to panic about," Marina replied with a reassuring smile. "What I am more concerned about is you," she added. "We can have the baby out in minutes if need be, Diana. The issue is that we can't stop this labour and I know that doesn't sound reassuring. But, the fact that you've gotten this far with this pregnancy is a good sign and that little baby is a fighter. She wants to be born and we will do everything we can to make her as healthy as can be. But we need to get her out."

Diana allowed her head to drop back against the pillows, tears leaking out of her eyes.

"Please, just save my baby," she croaked out, curling herself into her husband's embrace. Patrick cradled his wife, holding her closely as he tried to keep his own tears at bay.

Marina nodded, turning to Mhairi. "Get Kian on the phone, let him know the details and let's get Diana prepped for surgery."

Looking back to Diana, Marina reached out to squeeze her other hand. "Everything's going to be okay," she told her, turning to leave the room.

Heading for the main reception desk on the floor, Marina called up to the appointed master of the hospital, Dr Rebecca Ahearn. She'd stepped into the position two years prior and Marina had completed all of her training under Rebecca's tutelage. She informed her of what was happening and was asked to keep her up to speed on Diana's progress. With a sigh, Marina put the phone down and allowed her shoulders to slump. Mhairi appeared in front of her, having walked around to the other side of the desk.

"You've been here for 26 hours," she tutted at Marina. "You need to go home."

"No," Marina vehemently shook her head. "I want to be here when Diana gets out of surgery."

Mhairi rolled her eyes. "Alright! But afterwards, I want to see you marching out of that front door en route home," she chuckled as Marina nodded at her. "Why don't you pop down and see how Colin and Ciaran are doing? Maggie told me that the parents have been asking after you."

"Okay. Buzz me when Diana is out of surgery."

Marina headed on down the corridor to the NICU. She approached the large glass windows, looking in on the babies with a sad smile on her face. She was filled with elation to see that the majority of them were doing so well but there were still some worrying cases. They'd lost their first baby in 6 months the previous week and Marina was devastated watching the parents grieve for the child.

Tapping on the window, Marina gained the attention of Sara O'Connell and her husband Danny. They were parents to 4 week old twins Colin and Ciaran. Sara had been admitted at 32 weeks pregnant with advanced labour. Their case was exceptionally close to Marina's heart because she'd been the only doctor on call and had actually delivered the twins herself.

Sara and Danny waved her in with beaming smiles on their faces. Putting on a gown, cap and gloves, Marina entered the NICU and joined Sara and Danny as they cooed over the twins. They were coming on leaps and bounds and had recently been taken out of their incubators.

"Would you like to hold one of them?" Danny asked with a look of fatherly pride of his face. Marina nodded and pulled up a chair, allowing Sara to place Ciaran in her arms. He wriggled a little, unused to the new person who was holding him. He settled down, wrapping his tiny fingers around Marina's index finger, bringing the tip to his mouth, using it as a makeshift soother. Marina was in awe of both babies. She remembered the worry that had coursed through her just after their delivery and now here they were, breathing on their own and being held by their parents.

"How are you guys doing?" She asked Sara and Danny.

They both had reserved looks on their faces. Marina could see that the stress was taking its toll on them.

"We're getting there," Danny told her. "It's not been easy."

"I don't expect that it will have been. But these boys are fighters," Marina grinned when Ciaran snuggled closer into her, gripping her fingers tighter. "They're doing so well. Another few weeks and they'll be going home with the both of you."

Sara reached up to flick a couple of tears away from her eyes.

"We can't thank you enough, Marina. You've done so much for us," she said. "We don't even know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything," Marina looked between the two of them. "I'm only doing my job. And remember, if you ever need anything afterwards, you know where to find me," she used her free hand to squeeze one of Sara's.

Maggie appeared behind Marina, squeezing her shoulder. Marina turned to look at her, smiling.

"Hello, Maggie," she grinned at the older woman. "How are you?"

"Not bad, dear," Maggie replied. "It's bath time for these boys though."

"Of course, I need to get going anyway. Thank you for letting me see them," Marina told Danny and Sara. They both nodded, each taking it in turns to hug her once she had passed Ciaran to Maggie. Bidding all of them goodbye, Marina headed back towards the main reception of the neonatal unit. Her beeper began to sound as she stripped off her gown, cap and gloves.

Diana was out of surgery. Mhairi met her half way, a small smile on her lips.

"Kian said everything went as well as expected. Diana is resting in her room and they've set up an incubator for Caitriona."

Marina grinned as Mhairi informed her of the good news. "I'm going to pop in to see Patrick."

Mhairi nodded and headed back towards the reception desk and Marina made a beeline for Patrick and Diana's room. She knocked a couple of times and then popped her head inside. Patrick was sitting by his wife's bedside holding her hand. He glanced up and quietly stood up, giving Diana's hand a reassuring squeeze as he followed Marina outside, closing the door behind him.

"Everything went well with the surgery. We've set up an incubator for Caitriona and she's being put on some medication to help with her breathing. For now, she's okay so don't worry too much. Let's focus on Diana just now. Just be with her and help her through. And from the bottom of my heart, I want to congratulate the both of you," Marina added with a beaming smile.

Patrick grinned, bracing his hands on his hips. "Can we see Caitriona?"

"As soon as Diana wakes up, Mhairi is going to take the two of you down to see her. For now, it'll just be through the window but in a few days you'll be able to go inside and sit by the incubator. As she progresses, you'll be able to hold her and Diana will be able to feed her. As things go, she's strong and for a baby born at 29 weeks, she's healthy, so that's good news."

"Thank you so much for everything you've done for us. I don't think we'd have gotten this far if it wasn't for the endless support you've give us, Marina," Patrick took her hands in his and squeezed them. "You've been a godsend to us. Thank you again," he smiled tearfully at her before going back inside the room to be with his wife.

It was in times like this that Marina felt an overwhelming pride in her job. Moments like this made up for all of the other devastating times that they had on the neonatal ward. Nothing felt as good as seeing parents leave with a healthy child. It contributed to helping all of them overcome the sheer sorrow when they lost a baby.

"Time for you to go home," Mhairi informed Marina as she approached the main reception desk. "No more excuses."

"Yes ma'am!" Marina saluted her, letting her shoulders sag as tiredness began to seep into her bones. It was 3.42pm and Marina had currently been in the hospital for over 27 hours. She needed decent food, decent coffee and an even more decent sleep. Bidding her goodbyes to Mhairi and few of the other nurses, Marina stopped by her office to remove her white coat and pick up her jacket and bag. She quickly listened to her answering machine and checked a few emails, making a note in her diary that the conference at Beaumont had been shifted to 9.30am the following day. Rebecca had asked Marina to come along to a conference about neonatal care with experts from around the country flying in to speak to them.

Slipping on her coat and lifting her bag, Marina grabbed her mobile and locked up her office, heading towards the elevators to exit the building, her shoulders sagging with relief that the day was finally over.

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><p><em><strong>Pronunciations:<strong>_

_**Mhairi - Vah-Ray**_

_**Kian - Kee-An**_

_**Ciaran - Kee-Ran **_

_**Caitriona - Kah-Tree-Nah**_


End file.
